Well here I am on this Mothering Sunday... alone for the first time with no daughter to shower me with her Mother´s day greetings, hugs and kisses but she sent me an amazing Moonpig Card with a photo of the two of us and a really eloquent message which just had me in tears. It was not so long ago when Krish would come home from school with her hand made mother´s day card and she would get Dad to buy something from her. Back in the good old days, we would wonder out to a nice country pub and have a Sunday lunch together... memories heh... If she was here now, I know we would spend a lovely day together... have a nice lunch, go for a stroll on the beach and knowing Krishy she would bake me a cake...how I miss the good old days!
I thought of her today and I thought of my mum. Mum ... what can I say... I think of mine and my heart melts. I never met anyone in my life who sacrificed so many things just to ensure her family was happy. All my life, I remember mum working, just like dad, working to make sure we had a good education, that we wore nice clothes and were able to go on school trips. After dad died, mum continued to work even harder because she wanted Naieya to do well and have the best level of education. Today at 65, she continues to go to work everyday with a smile on her face... she is always there at the end of a phone to listen to me if I am down or just need advice and she is an amazingly loving mum in law to my Ketan and my brother in laws. If there is one thing my mum always has and it is a smile on her face... and I love that. I used to think I got my determination from dad but I underestimated mum... no she is the survivor, the determined one who strives to achieve the best for her and her family and it is only now, I realise, my determination has come from her as well.
For many years when dad was alive, mum was learning to drive and each year she went for her test and failed... she was nervous and dad would just chuckle at her... but she never gave up... she must have done this for at least 10 years if not more... the year after my dad passed away, my mum took her test again and she passed... maybe she realised she now needed it more than ever before. If dad was here now, he would be so proud of her... the way she has stood up to life´s blows... losing him, losing her son and having the challenge of bringing one of her daughter´s up single handedly... and doing it always with a smile on her face... she is and always will be my inspiration. If you read this mum, thanks for being a fantastic mum, gran and mum in law... we love you.
I think of my gran today... and those of you who know her... know she has a reputation for being a "battle axe"... we all felt sorry for grandad (god bless him) when she rollicked him for eating too much of the things he liked and we laughed when he turned off his hearing aid when she told him off... but despite this ogre image... Ba as we all know her as... is a loving grandma, devoted to her family and especially her grand children. She may make out she is a tiger but inside she is a pussycat! Love you Ba!
Finally, although Ketan´s mum is no longer with us... she is always in our hearts. I have such found memories of mum... she was one of the most kindest, generous women I ever met with a wonderful sense of humour... I owe so much to her for making me feel so welcome in the Gandhi family, when I met and married Ketan. She always gave us good advice and I thank her for showing me how to cook surti style... I know that had she lived she would have loved Spain and spent many days out here with us. Wherever you are mum, we love you dearly.
So although, I was alone today... I did not feel it as all these thoughts and memories of my nearest and dearest ones surrounded me with warmth.
So to all the mums out there, past and present... Happy Mother´s Day!
Love
Sharmila
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
NNNNNNNineteen, Nineteen!!
On March 13th 1992, I was heavily pregnant with my first and little was I to know then, my only child. My hormones were playing were going crazy and I was ready to deliver anytime now. It was Friday morning and we were in our first marital home in Penwortham when my husband, Ketan, received a phone call from a female work colleague. I was not amused that he was laughing with her on the phone and being jovial and here I was looking like an African elephant. As the phone call ended, I asked who it had been on the phone ... and could not believe how jealous I was feeling...it sounds crazy but my jealousy got the better of me and I have no idea how but before I knew it, a frying pan was a flying pan... hurtling in Ketan´s direction. "Are you mad?" he shouted.... I just burst into tears.... What was going on? I had never felt so uptight....
The phone rang again and my husband refused to pick it up... for fear of being the target of another UFO. I answered the phone.... It was the police... "Oh my god!" I thought. "That was a quick response, have they got spy cameras in the house? Would they arrest a heavily pregnant, hormonal, elephant shaped woman?"
"Hello Mrs Gandhi," said a placid voice "We were wondering if you would come and translate for us today. We have a man in custody who only understands Gujarati and we need his statement." I sighed with relief and thinking how I needed to take my mind off my tender situation, I jumped at the opportunity and said yes. My husband anxiously asked me if I was sure that it was a wise thing to do, with only three days to go before baby´s due date. I knew it would help me to do something positive and told myself well if my waters break, at least they could wizz me down to the hospital quickly in a flashing lights panda car.
I spent the whole day in the cells with a prisoner, finding out what had happened and translating his statement. Ironically, I felt calm and really at ease and the morning´s outburst seemed so distant.
When Ketan came to pick me up, I couldn't believe how hungry I was...we headed for our local chippy and got a huge bag of hot, thick cut chips, mushy peas and I had a pickled onion. I scoffed it all down and enjoyed every bite.
In the early hours of Saturday 14th March, my waters broke and we rushed to hospital. After only three hours of huffing, puffing and pushing, suddenly a little head with a mop of thick black hair popped out. The midwife shouted that baby had arrived and she exclaimed at the sight of so much hair. I couldn't´t see a thing but Ketan peered down below and screamed with delight... it´s beautiful... and finally the midwife cried... "It´s a girl!".
All this time the radio had been playing pop songs... it was Radio 1 and as my little girl arrived, the radio went pip, pip, pip and it was 12.30pm.
As I look back at that memorable 24 hours which changed our lives forever, I am smiling and wishing I could do it all over again. Now today on March 14th 2011, my little girl who we named Krisha Kay Ketan Gandhi, is 19. Nineteen... where did all those years go? She is everything a daughter should be... she takes after her mum of course!... hardworking, kind, caring and clever... she is compassionate, loving and funny... I am biased of course because she is my little girl... but truly she is everything and it is just so difficult to express how much we love her.
For the first time in 19 years, we are not celebrating her birthday with her... it is odd. So this blog is dedicated to Krisha... everyday with you in our lives is a celebration. Thanks for making our lives complete... Love you more than words could ever express.
Your oh so proud mum and dad! xo
PS 19 years on and no more domestic UFOs in site!
The phone rang again and my husband refused to pick it up... for fear of being the target of another UFO. I answered the phone.... It was the police... "Oh my god!" I thought. "That was a quick response, have they got spy cameras in the house? Would they arrest a heavily pregnant, hormonal, elephant shaped woman?"
"Hello Mrs Gandhi," said a placid voice "We were wondering if you would come and translate for us today. We have a man in custody who only understands Gujarati and we need his statement." I sighed with relief and thinking how I needed to take my mind off my tender situation, I jumped at the opportunity and said yes. My husband anxiously asked me if I was sure that it was a wise thing to do, with only three days to go before baby´s due date. I knew it would help me to do something positive and told myself well if my waters break, at least they could wizz me down to the hospital quickly in a flashing lights panda car.
I spent the whole day in the cells with a prisoner, finding out what had happened and translating his statement. Ironically, I felt calm and really at ease and the morning´s outburst seemed so distant.
When Ketan came to pick me up, I couldn't believe how hungry I was...we headed for our local chippy and got a huge bag of hot, thick cut chips, mushy peas and I had a pickled onion. I scoffed it all down and enjoyed every bite.
In the early hours of Saturday 14th March, my waters broke and we rushed to hospital. After only three hours of huffing, puffing and pushing, suddenly a little head with a mop of thick black hair popped out. The midwife shouted that baby had arrived and she exclaimed at the sight of so much hair. I couldn't´t see a thing but Ketan peered down below and screamed with delight... it´s beautiful... and finally the midwife cried... "It´s a girl!".
All this time the radio had been playing pop songs... it was Radio 1 and as my little girl arrived, the radio went pip, pip, pip and it was 12.30pm.
As I look back at that memorable 24 hours which changed our lives forever, I am smiling and wishing I could do it all over again. Now today on March 14th 2011, my little girl who we named Krisha Kay Ketan Gandhi, is 19. Nineteen... where did all those years go? She is everything a daughter should be... she takes after her mum of course!... hardworking, kind, caring and clever... she is compassionate, loving and funny... I am biased of course because she is my little girl... but truly she is everything and it is just so difficult to express how much we love her.
For the first time in 19 years, we are not celebrating her birthday with her... it is odd. So this blog is dedicated to Krisha... everyday with you in our lives is a celebration. Thanks for making our lives complete... Love you more than words could ever express.
Your oh so proud mum and dad! xo
PS 19 years on and no more domestic UFOs in site!
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